Flash Fiction Friday: A Nobody

Published July 31, 2009

A Nobody

I was asleep in Neil Armstrong's arms when my old man kissed my mother and made her his woman. Neil had just got back from his Navy stint and was back in town getting ready to try and finally finish up at Purdue when they tied the knot. My pops and him rushed Phi Delta Theta together, which is where all of these Brothers in my life came from. "Moon" was the first word that ever came outta my lips, and Neil was the first person to hear it. I used to tell that one back in college, but now it just makes me seem old.

Those are the only stories I know about Neil since he went off and did his thing and we moved outta the midwest. Things were hard for a bit, but we wound up in Florida where my dad got a job at CBS thanks to Brother Burt Reynolds. He wasn’t anybody special yet, but he put in a good word because of the fraternal connection. After that they got to be buddies. Burt gave me my first knife and taught me how to whittle, which also led to my first stitches.

Pops and Burt used to toss the pigskin around and I was always the monkey in the middle. Burt had made it real big by the time I was tall enough to make an interception. Dad just kept going around to wherever CBS wanted him, doing whatever he could to keep a job. Sports helped me settle into new schools pretty quickly, which helped for the end of high school when dad brought us to New York with him to help make the Hulk.

When I went off to college and got initiated as a Phi myself I started to learn about all the other kids and their parents and uncles and grandparents. Everyone felt really important, which is why I tried my best to seem the same way. My stories weren’t the best compared to some of the other guys’ crazy lives, but the girls still liked to listen.

When I was home for Christmas Brother Bill Bixby and Lou Ferrigno used to come over for drinks with my dad after work on the set. Dad would always get drunk and show off and try to wrestle me. It seemed like the guys were into it so I would play along, but one time we had to rush to the hospital to get shards of a wine glass out of dad's cheek. We got pulled over in Lou's brand new Monte Carlo, but the officer let us go.

I bet some of those guys would remember me if I called them up, but they’d probably just think I needed a job. I usually try to forget about all those guys anyway, ‘cause lots more important things have happened to me along the way. There were the wives and the pets and the accident and the operations. Those Brothers are all I can really remember, though. Or at least they're easier to talk about.

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Gabe is back with us this week, so read his, Caiti's, and Robin's pieces too!